gambling commission

Here are some BAM(H)! POW! SOB! questions related to games!

17. Boggle: the best game ever (other than backgammon)
I played a little online Boggle just now so that I can say this with certainty, but I don’t think Boggle is the best game ever. Sorry, BAM(H). I think that it is a very good game, but it is not the best. I don’t feel that backgammon is the second best game ever, either. But clearly, you guys have something with games that start with the letter B that I just don’t understand. Might I suggest bocce and Battleship to you?

Some games that I enjoy include Scattergories, Taboo, Trivial Pursuit, Tripoley, Cranium, and Monopoly. But the best game of all time is a little game called Shopopoly, which is Monopoly adapted for Old Navy. For example, instead of Boardwalk, there’s something like tank tops or flip flops or fleece jackets. As far as I know, this game is only available to Old Navy employees after they do something particularly heinous, like scraping gum off the store floor for five hours or opening 150 Old Navy credit cards. I stole mine from the stock room when I worked there. I don’t know why someone left it there, because you really did have to do something really really awful to deserve one, and if I did something that big, I’d want to keep my prize forever. But perhaps that worker died from their deed, or perhaps they died by inhaling the dyes that are in the clothes.

18. Age at which you are too old to be on Facebook
If someone can make me an application where I can play Battleship with people on Facebook, similar to the way that one can play Scrabble on Facebook, then I would be willing to say that no one is too old to be on Facebook. Normally I might have said that everyone is too old to be on Facebook, but if an old person can make me a Battleship application, then I would say no one is too old. I came to this conclusion while addressing the best game ever issue above. Please, I want to play Facebook Battleship. I found where you can play online but I think the computer is cheating.

19. Your mom's high score on Guitar Hero
Guitar Hero is a game where you push buttons on a fake guitar that correspond with notes on your television screen, and by pushing these buttons, you play a rock song. My mom discovered this game when she helped by brother George move. She is a natural talent. When my brothers were teaching me how to play, I had to keep hearing, “Mom is so much better than you!” My mom and I have been playing a lot of Guitar Hero these days, and for awhile, I was doing a little better than her. Then I came home and would play, and I’d set a high score, but it wouldn’t be as high as Mom’s. One day, I came home, and she said, “Ooh, I played a song that you just have to play because it will give you a very high score! The song is about killing? Killing for something?” I ask if she means “Killing in the Name” by Rage Against the Machine. It turns out that is what she meant. I find it very entertaining that my Mom is so good at Guitar Hero.