Emmys!

Well, if you read the post below, you'll learn that I am drinking, packing, and live blogging, which is all the rage these days. The Emmys are about to start. Stay tuned for Emmy gossip, three hours late (pacific time).

God help me, I love musical numbers at award shows, but Jeremy Piven looks a little bewildered.

Oh, awkward! They mention Isaiah Washington, but cut to T.R. Knight! Everyone will reference that in their round-up!!!!!!

Who is Ryan Seacrest?

The Emmys are "in the round". So hip.

First award of the night...we have to sit through a monologue from Ray Romano before we can get to it. And the winner is....Jeremy Piven! Are Jeremy Piven and John Cusack still friends? I don't know, and it drives me crazy!!

Time for ice cream!

I think Jaime Pressley teared up more when thanking her lawyer and manager than she did when talking about her baby.

Moment #1 that I love: Katherine Heigl correcting the voiceover announcer's pronunciation of her name.

Ooh, a montage! The best thing you can have at an award show, after a musical number. Funny lines from late-night talk shows, seguewaying into a tribute to Tom Snyder. Weird!

Jennifer Love Hewitt, you're so dumb.

Now, if you know about my late-night viewing habits, you know a Stewart vs. Colbert vs. Letterman face-off is impossible for me. But then, Conan won, for writing. I haven't watched that show since Andy Richter left, and I don't plan to. But I guess I'm okay with it? No. I'm not. But I guess it's better than Bill Maher.

If there was an Emmy for best box packer, I'd win! It' sbecause I use so much packing tape. It's the equivalent of gratuitous crying in terms of acting.

You can see Christina Aguilera's arm hair.

Things are kind of boring right now.

Steve Carell is on. Hopefully a sign that things will get better...and yes, there's John Krasinski. Things are better. Daily Show wins. Then Tony Bennett wins, and his director or someone says something weird like "documusical." Apparently Tony married a 25-year-old (but don't sue me Tony Bennett, I'm bad at telling people's ages).

I like how Mary Louise Parker looks vaguely pissed off by everything.

I'm getting vaguely worried that Britney Spears hasn't made a surprise appearance yet, per the rumors. I could just check the internet to see if she appears. But that would be cheating. I'm trying to pretend that I'm watching this on Eastern Standard Time (a.k.a. God's time).

The cast of the Sopranos gets a standing ovation.

Al Gore gets an Emmy presented by the president of MySpace. If only I could provide incisive political commentary....then I would have something to say. "More to come...current.com next month"....what does that mean, Al?

I just cut my jeans on my packing tape. Damn you, moving.

Ooh, Kanye West and Rainn Wilson...seems a situation ripe for comedy!

Nah, not really.

Ricky Gervais didn't show up, so there was a Daily Show reunion because Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert just gave the award to Steve Carell.

There's been like this weird cutaway three times in the show. Is that when someone cursed or said something political? It just happened during Sally Field's speech.

Right now they are doing the tribute to people who died in the past year. At the Oscars, this is my least favorite moment, because it becomes a popularity contest between the people who have died, and I think they should all be recognized equally in death. The Emmys people seem to be muting most of the responses, which is good, but a few people are getting applause that I can hear. People miss Ed Bradley and Peter Boyle.

Oh man I'm tuckered. I think we're getting into the home stretch. Ugly Betty wins best actress. James Spader beats James Gandolfini. I don't watch either Boston Legal or The Sopranos but even this doesn't make sense to me.

Emmys in the round means that some people get really awful seats.

30 Rock wins best comedy series (hope you didn't Tivo this!). Then another commercial! Are you kidding me?! This show is running long and you decide to do a commercial?

The Sopranos wins Best Drama. Are they going to say what the ending means?....No, they just talk about how the music on the show was good and how gangsters are people like you and me.

Well, that's the Emmys. I have to go to bed.