Happy Da, Birthday Ve

Okay, I must first say that this post will never say all I want it to. For one, the individual that is the subject of this post has had too great of an influence on my life for me to get this completely right, but for two, I have had a few of Tia Lou's good strong margaritas.

But April 12 is always a pretty memorable date in my life, because there is not a year that this day passes that I don't go, hey, this is David Letterman's birthday. And this year, David Letterman is 60. David Letterman is the celebrity in my life that I would miss the most if he was gone. So this is my tribute to him (not to be done in anything so cheesy as a Top Ten list, because I am nowhere near the master).

Dave has been around my life since I was a little kid. We would go to Holden Beach when we were little kids, usually two weeks over July 4th. July 4th I would not go outside, because E! would show all of the Late Night with David Letterman (NBC) specials, one right after the other, for like 10 hours. Dave in an Alka-seltzer suit, being dipped in water, over and over. Stupid pet tricks. How could I go outside with something like that happening?

So then, when I was in middle school or so, I used my babysitting money to buy a television with a built-in VCR, so I could tape Dave at night, and watch him the next morning, as I was getting ready for school (eventually, I let Conan into my taping ritual, but it was always about Dave). The thing about it was, if I pushed rewind as soon as I woke up, and then watched the opening segment, it would wake me up. Then I had exactly the right amount of time to run downstairs, toast two cinnamon-sugar Pop-Tarts, and be back upstairs by the time the next segment started.

Things I saw in that time period:
--Warren Zevon filling in as the band director while Paul Shaffer shot the movie Blues Brothers 2000. It was the first I'd ever heard of Warren Zevon and I became really interested in this guy who called himself Dave's "comedy deputy" and played songs like "Werewolves of London" as Dave was going to commercial break. As I result I found one of my favorite singers of all-time. I've spent a lot of time on YouTube looking for clips of this period. (this happened after the high school period, but after I went to college, I didn't have as much time to watch Dave. But I definitely watched the day I heard Warren Zevon died, so I could hear Dave say goodbye. Another time I watched in college? Dave's 9/11 show...when he gracefully captured what we all were thinking. I hadn't even been to New York at that point and I felt the pain of being a New Yorker at that point, just based on Dave's monologue that night)
--The guest hosts that filled in when Dave had a quintuple bypass, and Dave's tearful but triumphant return. It tore me up.
--Dave hosting the Oscars. I don't care what anyone says. It was funny. ("Do you wanna buy a monkey?")

It wasn't fair to put the 9/11 show or the bypass show in parentheses above, because frankly, I could write a whole entry about both. But here are the other moments I'll always treasure:
-Pat and Kenny Read Oprah Transcripts
-Dave's feud with Oprah (she was totally out of town)
-Dave guessing what kind of pie his mom made for Thanksgiving
-Dave works at a Taco Bell
-Dave talks to kids segments
-"There's not a man, woman or child alive that doesn't enjoy a refreshing beverage"
-"I wouldn't give your troubles to a monkey on a rock"

One of the only things I really had to do when I went to New York City last summer was go and see the Ed Sullivan theater. Recently I started taping Letterman again (also Daily Show and Colbert), because I am too old to stay up for it (before, I was too young), and while it takes up a good chunk of my life to watch so much late-night television on tape, it's worth it, because Dave gets better and better. It's bizarre and comforting and laugh-out-loud funny. I'm looking forward to tonight's show. I hope something that is the equivalent of Drew Barrymore flashing Dave happens. Happy birthday, Dave.